NOW is different from BEFORE

BEFORE:

Once I have a crush, I'd go all out just to get his attention!

Bwahaha papansin to the max...

I'd do anything just to cross paths with him "accidentaly"...

I'd be willing to make a fool out of myself just for him to like me back...

and I wouldn't dare care what others thought of me

because the only thing I could care about was him him him!!!

For short..I was out of my mind and I would have to look somethin like this---->

And at those moments, I felt like my head was on the cloud...

Too bad gravity had to pull me back down to see 

how shtupeed and crazy I looked

and of course..finally hear what people were saying about me

And each year, I try not to repeat the same crazy acts

Oh yes..I dont repeat THE SAME acts again...

Instead, I do less-immature-but-far-more-shtupeed things!

But if I could go back in time...I wouldnt change anything

Bec. if it wasn't for those times...I would be living a really boring life right now...

And even though...

~I was once branded as a flirt

~Gave the wrong impressions to teachers...

~did things I shouldnt have

~grades decreased...

Thanks to those things....

~I have found my bestfriend-slash-other-half (a.k.a my ex-karibal)

~I learned that life isnt always about boys..boys.and more boys!

~I've gotten to know my friends better...form the real to the fake

~Im feeling happy right now!

NOW:

I still go crushing like a normal teenage girl...

that when seeing her crush makes her day and go gaga from time2time

But that's just it..I dont take crushing seriously now...

and I definatelt dont go all out for the guy!

And guess what? 

I like it this way ^^

Being happy AND proud to be single AND free!

and I plan to stay this way for a loong time 

(ohw..3-5 yrs maybe? hahaha)

It was already in my hands....

It’s red, super sleek, soft to the touch and has a movable camera and most of all, it’s brand new---it’s the phone I’ve always dreamed of having and it’s finally mine! Plus, it came from my Uncle who puts others happiness before his own, who wouldn’t mind if there was none left for himself as long as the people he cares for are happy. So you could imagine how delighted  I was…….and how it PAINED me to let it go when I wasn’t even able to have it for  a whole day.

You might think that “hey if you liked it that much, then why give it away??? Stupid!.” But I wasn’t giving it to just anyone, but to my mother, my mother who had thought of others before her own (I think it runs in their side of the family..haha) Trust me, it was a very hard thing to even just suggest to her that it was FINE by me if she could have it (y face was telling otherwise -.-) Tears would slowly form in my eyes everytime I remembered the reasons how much I loved IT(no exaggerations here!).

For the long ride home, I’ve been weighing the reasons why I should or shouldn’t give it over. Then after much reflecting…It dawned on me….How materialistic I have become lately, when in the end, all these THINGS would eventually equal to nothing. Yes, I was guilty of sourgraping from time to time but another epiphany came over me….

I was always on the receiving end! For the past few years, I’ve received more than I could imagine from the people in my life. And in return, I had nothing to show for. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to, but because I couldn’t. It was either that I didn’t have the time or the money for it L

Now, if receiving things would be make me so happy..I wonder how much more if  I’d be able to give to the people around me? I bet I could just die! LOL…

So maybe giving up THE cellphone for my mom who would actually need it…Might just be what would make me happy ^^,

~sheydilee~

NOTE: Made 2 days ago...wasnt able to go online till now -.-

face it

As you might have read in my last post, I have this extremely huge fear of being infront of a crowd ...and then...I realized something, it might not be because of the hugeness of a crowd, instead, it's the judgements and critics of others! That's what I'm REALLY afraid of...Afraid of what they might say...

THEN...

something hit me...not something new...but a known-fact..a fact that most of us forget...

No matter what others say, that does not define who you are or your capabilities...Take criticisms in a possitive way...Just do your best, and the leave the rest to Him ^-^